Sunday, August 28, 2016

However long it takes

A dear friend of mine lost her soulmate & best friend recently. She came over last night and we drank some wine and talked, laughed and cried for hours. I hope I was able to help her some. I know she helped me. You see, I'm still grieving almost six years later.

Over those six years I've faked my way through a lot of different situations. I'm still faking it on so many levels. I've surrounded myself with memories. I see Tim everywhere I look in this little house of mine. He's always by my side, in my head and in my heart. That will never change.

Last night I dreamed of his final days. I heard him telling me how much he loved me. I held him. I felt his kiss on my forehead. I love him so much still.

Right before I woke up (I was somewhere in that between dream and reality place), I heard him telling me that he was proud of me. That I was doing good and to keep following my heart. To do what makes me happy. That happiness was everything.

I've been thinking about making changes in my life. Making it simpler. Now I know that that is the right decision. Because Tim told me. (Thank you babyluv. I needed that.)
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