Is it discipline or abuse? I say it's stupidity

Reading my morning news as usual, I came across a story that left me somewhat speechless. I wasn’t speechless because I had no opinion about the story. I was speechless because I had so many things to say about it I couldn’t figure out where to start!

Now that I’ve settled down a little bit, I guess I’ll start with the details of the story…

It was about a 9 year old boy who’s father had charges of child abuse filed against him for shooting the 9 year old in the butt with a BB gun. The man faces 6 years in prison and a $10,000 fine. The boy wrote an essay about the incident, the teacher turned it in to the police and the man was arrested. He was released on bond but was given the instructions to not threaten or engage in any acts of violence against his son and not to engage in physical discipline of any child. In the story the father was quoted as saying “I knew right away it was a stupid thing I did.” He shot the boy in the butt when he wouldn’t move away from the front of the TV.

Here’s what I thought:

1. We’re talking about a 9 year old. They embellish things. They make things way more exciting than they really were. If you’ve ever read a 9 year olds “How I spent my summer” essay then you know what I’m talking about. It’s incredibly cool and quite entertaining 10 years later when you read it but I don’t think you should take each word as gospel. Some things may not be the actual way it happened.

2. We’re talking about a 9 year old. It was an incredibly stupid thing that this father did. A 9 year olds reflexes and/or thought processes are not developed enough to decide in a split second if they need to move or not and then move. I’ve seen 9 year olds stand there and watch as something came hurtling through the air and smacked into their face/arm/stomach.

3. Are there no investigations done? Do the police just come into your home and arrest you because your 9 year old said you did something? I know the man admitted that he did it and apparently there was a BB in a butt, but it doesn’t seem like it was done in an overly hateful way. I don’t think he wanted to injure his child. Just make him move. I’ll repeat that what he did was an incredibly stupid thing. But I can see it happening. You’re watching TV, the kid won’t move, you’re favorite whatever is on and it’s been a long day… you’re irritated. He shouldn’t have taken his irritation out on his kid but I can see it happening.

4. 6 years in prison and a $10,000 fine?!? Ok, what he did just turned into a really, really, incredibly stupid thing. Seriously. That seems a little excessive for a BB in the butt. Especially when I can go online and see all the child molesters that live in my neighborhood. I just feel so much better now that this BB shooter will be locked up. Idiots.

5. He was ordered not to engage in any acts of violence against his son. I didn’t realize popping off a BB gun was an act of violence. At one point in my life I lived with acts of violence. I would happily trade those days for an irritated “You’re blocking the TV! Move!” POP! But then I think, yeah, that wasn’t cool. It WOULD hurt. (It still could have been worse.)

6. I started to wonder who would keep a BB gun within reach of their couch but then I remembered some friends of mine that did have guns (BB and otherwise) sitting in the corner of the living room or propped up by a chair. They weren’t gangsters or anything *lol* they were country folk. Nuff said.

7. He was ordered not to engage in physical discipline of any child. What he did was not discipline. He let his irritation control his brain and his brain acted badly. It was not his shining moment.

Things have really changed since I was a kid. I can remember my father telling me to go in his closet and choose the belt that I wanted him to use to whip me. You had to choose well. If you brought a tiny one out he’d go get a bigger one and you’d get extra licks. If you were bold and brought the big one to start out you got extra licks for being a smartass. It was best to just stay towards the middle and hope you chose right. That was the way it was and you behaved correctly to avoid those long walks to the closet thinking about how bad your butt was going to hurt when it was over and hoping that maybe this time you wouldn’t get more than 5 swats. That was our discipline: training through pain aversion.

I just don’t think what the father did was so bad. I can definitely think of worse. I guess my wrapped up opinion is the thought that keeps drifting into my head… It was an incredibly stupid thing to do.


I'd like to add a note here. I added this to my comments but sometimes you may not read the comments so I wanted to say it here too. I in no way thought it was ok for the man to shoot his son. On my #3 thought I was only saying I could understand how the man could react the way he did. I would never shoot my child with anything (except maybe a rubberband and that would be playing not anger) and he was definitely wrong for doing that!

small town, BIG HONOR

Have you heard of the United States Achievement Academy (USAA)? This organization founded in 1978 by Dr. George A. Stevens recognizes and honors outstanding students around the United States. The best way to tell you about this awesome program is to show you the founder’s message. I have copied it exactly as it appears on the website:

I would like to take this opportunity to personally thank the hundreds of thousands of educators who have participated in the United States Achievement Academy's national recognition program for exceptional students.

The Academy has been honoring exceptional students through educators and the results of scholastic scores for three decades. The tradition of recognizing outstanding students has become a reality because of the over 900,000 dedicated teachers nationwide who have nominated students into the USAA program.

The Academy salutes the concerned, interested teachers who create pride and a feeling of accomplishment in the students they honor.

The exclusive members of the Academy have an average overall grade point average of a 3.8 on a 4.0 scale. The Academy membership represents the elite among today's students. Incredibly, many of our members have achieved perfect ACT and SAT scores, and excellent grade point averages. Among our athletic divisions, our members hold prestigious titles such as All-State, All-Region and All-Conference. Whether a teacher nominates a student for exceptional citizenship and leadership qualities or for outstanding academics, students truly benefit when being honored by their educator or coach.

Each year, the Academy receives letters of appreciation from educators and students nationwide who have been inspired by the Academy's program. We thank you for taking the time to write us and share your thoughts about the program.

It has been an honor working with such talented and exceptional students and educators through the USAA. I look forward to the next decade with great expectations and to serving the nation's next generation of exceptional students.

Sincerely,

George Stevens
AB, MA, DDS
Founder

Sealy Junior High is an excellent school. There are, on average, 18 students per class and 30% of the teachers have been there 21 years or longer. My son attended Sealy Junior High and all I have is good memories of his time there.

Now the USAA has bestowed this honor on one of our own Sealy Texas students. Rebecca Presley is a junior high school student here. I personally don’t know Rebecca but in a town of only 6200 people, I’m sure I’ve seen her around.

I’m proud that a student from our town has received this honor. I’m proud FOR her and OF her. Great job Rebecca!